George Wood
"You know how we love lame humor." --The essence of George Wood. George Wood was a video game reviewer, who is known for his often impractical reviews, and cringe-worthy comments. He is a founder and CEO of NAViGaTR (National Academy of Video Game Trade Reviewers). NAViGaTR In the 90's, he hosted a show called "Flights of Fantasy", which aired on a Maryland public access channel during this time. Later, Wood founded NAViGaTR (National Academy of Video Game Trade Reviewers) who uploaded his old reviews for online viewing, under the new title Gaming in the Clinton Years. He was said to have died sometime around 2006 (probably from committing suicide over Final Fantasy IX's lack of voice acting), but it was quickly found out that it was nothing but a marketing ploy to cash in on NAVGTR's immense popularity. George Wood also ran a separate (but equally unnerving) show titled "George Wood Lame Game Show". List of Reviews This list is in chronological order. *Mega Man 8 *Mario Kart 64 *Twisted Metal 2 *Tomb Raider II *Super Metroid *GoldenEye 007 *Formula 1 *Donkey Kong Country *Contender *Nintendo64 vs. Playstation *Buster Bros Collection *Final Fantasy VII *Xenogears *Castlevania: Symphony of the Night *Final Fantasy VI Memorable Quotes *''"But don't forget to anticipate the angle of the dangle when the ball bounces off the wall."'' *''"Bill Cosby would find him quite tasty. Oh wait a minute; I'm thinking of the pudding commercials. No I'm right! He does JELL-O commercials, too!"'' *''"You should be able to complete this stage in five tries."'' *''"Mario Kart 64 is fun to play, except when you're losing."'' *''"Twisted Metal 2 from Sony banks on the very essence of James Bond: action-thriving men. Yes; we're taking about Tim Taylor, grunt-out-loud-to-show-your-manhood type of men!"'' *''"You play Lara Croft, complete with front-loaded anvils."'' *''"...We have a challenge for Eidos. In Tomb Raider III, create a storyline in which Lara gets breast cancer. Imagine the drama of a vulnerable Lara Croft, still persisting in her worldly adventures despite her illness. It needs fleshing out, no pun intended, but we guarantee the gaming world would be shocked, stunned, and moved at the effort to make Lara's character more meaningful. We love Lara, but it's about time the industry had a big shock for a change.'' *''"Samus's mission will be tough, but a woman's got to do what a woman's got to do!"'' *''"Not many games are like the Metroid series: incredible fun! You'll love this game dearly; your game heart will beat because of it."'' *''"The graphics, character animation, and big characters deliver hot action!"'' *''"Okay, enough of Bond."'' *''"Where's the creativity? Why not have a game where you have to find and drive to the hospital, before your wife delivers her baby? Now that, would be fun."'' *''"Donkey Kong Country is truly perfect. If you do not get this amazing generation of Donkey Kong madness, you are stupid. Yes, I know. That's insulting, but it's also the truth."'' *''"Play it loud in stereo, duuuuuuuuuuude!"'' *''"Oh by the way, if Square doesn't add voice overs to Final Fantasy IX, I'm committing suicide. I hate text!"'' *"We had a lot of fun creating three fat black ladies fighting one skinny white turd. You don't get to do that everyday!" Category:Retsupuraed